Disabled

I haven’t been updating my blog recently because I have fucked up my rotator cuff and it makes typing long pieces of text quite annoying, and I have to do some school work anyway and after that I just want to rest my poor arm.

I am also having a terrible time with school and I quite honestly don’t know what I want to do with my life anymore. I’ll just say I’m really thankful I have such awesome friends that believe in me no matter what.

In two weeks he’ll be living with three cats

So I’ll be moving out soon. Yes I am! Unfortunately not to the apartment I talked about before, there was a young couple with a baby checking the apartment as well so we pretty much knew it there and then that we were not going to get it. Fortunately another similar apartment with a reasonable rent came along, so we applied for that the same day we found out we didn’t get the first apartment. It was a funny little aparment because I had lived in those buildings when I first moved to this town 15 years ago and the layout was exactly the same as in our old apartment. The buildings had been recently renovated when we first moved in and apparently they hadn’t been touched since, as you could tell by the looks of the yard and the balconies. But did I mention the rent was pretty cheap?

…We didn’t get that apartment either. But! We were offered another apartment from the same buildings, which we happily accepted and started all the appropriate procedures, including signing off our old leases. Then, a week later, another phone call. Apparently the old tenant of the apartment had decided they have absolutely no intention to move even though we were told the apartment would be empty by April already. Yeah, apparently you can do that, who knew? Thanks to the planets being in favourable positions, another apartment was becoming available by the time we were supposed to move in, so we didn’t have to resign to becoming hobos. Or sue anyone. I really, really won’t believe everything has worked out just fine until we have actually moved in and we have all our crap in the new apartment place.I have typed the word “apartment” way too many times. I might have to borrow Phoebe’s apartment pants now.

I am planning to be really, ridiculously happy. It is going to be totally different from the last time I lived with someone (Who I can see has been reading my blog, by the way. Why are you doing that?) because this time we’ll actually be equals and no one is a slob. Well, apart from Little Cat and Tiki, but they are only babies after all.

Babies.

 

THERE IS NO MOTIVATION

And I mean that in two different ways.

1. I ain’t got any. Seriously. I can’t get ANYTHING done anymore, apart from eating and packing. (Yes, packing. More about that some other time.) I have now explained my situation to two teachers which will hopefully stop them from thinking I am just a complete twat ignoring all their emails, but I think I need to see the school psychologist about my issues because I’m also suffering from terrible lack of self-esteem regarding my nursing persona.

2. If you sit and wait for the motivation fairy to arrive and smack you on the head with productivity, it won’t. It doesn’t exist. Sometimes you may feel like doing things, and then you do them, but if you only do things at the height of motivation you might have to stand around a lot of the time wondering why life and deadlines keep wooshing past you. Just imagine motivation doesn’t even exist and JUST DO IT GODDAMMIT. I am trying to get this through my fluffy little brain or else I might just become a stagnant puddle of water and get filled with poo.

The other day I thought, hey!, I might be scared a lot but there’s nothing I can’t do regardless! Fear is not a wall you can’t climb over, it’s just a thought in your head. In your head! And then I got too much out of my comfort zone and froze, and that’s been getting me a bit down lately. I am pretty much the most neurotic and nervous person I know, and some days I doubt my ability to cope with life so much that I just consider becoming a hermit who eats dust and dead fruit flies. Or dying, because sometimes I can’t even cope with myself. These thoughts are terribly destructive to me trying to be productive and survive school. I feel like I’m screaming inside of my head most of the time.

These awesome little post-its are from Things We Forget, I will try and remember them. I’m saving my favourite one last, because to be honest, I must be pretty great to have come such a long way.

Radio silence

It’s quite embarrassing to start a new blog and then not post anything for ages, especially when my old blog went basically mute, but I’ve actually got a legit reason this time.

I get colds. Not just a cold, several colds.

I can’t even tell you where I’m going right now, but within three months I think this is my fifth cold. I am obviously much better now, only full of bloody snot (figuratively AND literally), but last week I had the sorest mothertrucking throat I’ve ever had and a fever for three consecutive days. I couldn’t even sleep properly at night because I kept waking up to drooling all over myself, which was weird. However, I am thankful for two things: it was not a school week, and I’ve got an amazing boyfriend who took care of me and made me food the whole week. In return, I kept spying on his WoW-playing and asking “Whatcha doing now? What about now? What’s that? OMG, is that a blue tiger?” the whole time.

 

Because OBVIOUSLY my life is extremely interesting and full of exciting adventures, here’s what I’ve been doing recently:

- I have not been terribly into school. We’re doing surgery-related stuff this spring and I don’t really care – I have no interest in taking that path in my future career. I kind of prefer patients when they are awake, plus there is so much machinery and equipment involved and I’m just not very into that. Tough titty, though, a week of perioperative nursing awaits me next week.

This might look like fun but actually I, the one in the very back, am crying inside.

- We’ve been waiting to hear from student apartments since December, and last week we got bored of waiting and decided to look into privately owned apartments as well. Obviously they are more expensive and you have to pay for water and electricity yourself, but that’s only really a change for me. We found a pretty good place yesterday so we’re gonna go check it out tomorrow, wish us luck! Tomorrow also happens to be our half-anniversary, so I hope that’s a good sign.

- Despite having annoying school work to do, I have actually managed to do some writing. Something that might be a book one day has progressed slightly, and I’m going to take part in a poetry competition I didn’t properly have time for last year – thankfully it’s an annual thing. Unfortunately there won’t be a lot of book-writing happening for me in the near future what with all the boring things to do, but luckily poetry is easier to squeeze out of my brain.

- I am so addicted to Reddit. For that reason this is the last point in the list.

I must have turned invisible

Which must be the only good reason why I can’t see my blog post I wrote last week with my phone through the WordPress app. Did anyone else see it?! It was about snow and stuff.

…Or have I accidentally installed a filter for my blog that prevents all talk about the weather? That would be a shame because the weather is pretty much the only thing anyone talks about these days. Or ever. Okay, fine, it might not be -30 C anymore, but look, it’s been snowing all night again! And there’s that very subtle smell of spring in the air sometimes when it’s slightly windy! It doesn’t even matter what weather it is -  as long as there’s a change in it, they can always write news about how surprising it is. What they really should say is: “Oh look, it’s cold in February just like every goddamn year. Your car might not start too easily this morning, so don’t forget to wear several layers when you attempt going to work before you give up and call in sick while collapsing to the bed to hibernate until April.” I think it might require a car to be surprised about even the most common weather, so I guess it’s time for me to get that driving licence only when I’m so utterly bored with life that nothing else can surprise me.

I don’t really know why I’m writing a blog post right before I have to go to school. Well, technically, about two hours after I should go to school since I skipped the first lecture in hopes of finally getting some sleep. Oops. Anyway, you guys who liked my anesthesiology post for some reason: wish me luck because I’ve got an exam today.

Anesthesiology

I don’t actually know if I’ll be able to read any of my notes after the lecture. Just as well, I’m only really writing to stay awake. Seriously, Monday mornings, just stop it.

Old blog search terms

Since I’m far too lazy to write a blog post with actual substance, I thought I should share some of the funniest search engine terms that have lead people to my old blog, The Cat With Glasses. I hope they weren’t too disappointed when they couldn’t actually find the things they were looking for in my blog.

• exercise dvd for obese people that cant walk
• “wee on”
• sunny titts
• photo of cat wearing glasses reading the paper
• exercise for cat could’nt walk
• b nnnnnngh
• boobs and glasses
• challenging boobies
• cats ballet stuff

Alrighty, I think I’ve now mentioned “boobs” often enough to get interesting search terms for this blog, too. Do you reckon I should extend into talking about bottoms as well?